JustJack

just read a blog of a friend of mine. i thought perhaps i should pen down something as well since i have a little quiet time today.

like what my friend has written also in his blog about quiet time. i guess many of us now living in the city has a lack of quiet time. simple because we are so surrounded with stimulations. be it visual,sound. too much. and yet we got so used to it that we thought they are not there.

even internet surfing is a stimulation. quietness in our definition is no longer just being in a room doing nothing. quietness has lost its true meaning because we thought by justing doing nothing we are quietened. but no. our handphones are still on, our tv are still on, our radios are still on.

this bombardment is something i always feel un-used to. because the true quietness comes from not wanting all these being around me. the need of not needing the phone to be on. the need of needing the tv to be on. and so so many things.

doing nothing is probably the hardest thing that i can do now.

i am recently going to go thru changes job change to be speciic. i guess it has kept me busy for a while and made me so not quiet. i am needed to make so many decisions that i thought i can handle but i know it is making me tired and not really have time for myself. but i know i have got to go thru it. just a job change alone is just so tiring. but i know it is for the better just because i know i am better than what i am.

i wish for peacefulness soon. after the hustle bustle.. i wanna be quiet again.

quiet.undisturbed.relaxed.

It is amazing. I am listening to the song La Cham Bhor… ( by Faye Wong) You know the song ? Anyway it is not called La Cham Bhor.. it is called fu2 zhao4. Anyway no chinese software. Sorry for the han yu pin yin.

So long never heard this song and it is now playing on 97.2 fm. Well yeah got to admit i am old now. It seems like yesterday when i was still sitting in front of the TV watching shows on SBC. Remember SBC ? Singapore Boardcasting Corporation ? Bin Fen 83 ?

So stages by stages.. we are going thru them. baby, kid, teen,young adult, adult. We look back at it in chunks. remembering them in chunks. Often recall us being kids… secondary days, uni days.. seems easier to remember our life this way. Compartmentalize makes life more accessible and valuat-able.

If we spend more time remembering single memories perhaps we can capture our life more accurately. By incidents… by events … it adds more flavour to your conversation and contemplation.

I am recently in the process of finding my next job. Again.. in the midst of it i get busy with it and got totally cut off with my surroundings. I saw nothing but ‘dreaming’ where i should be. what wages should i fetch. but my real self will always echo back a different story. concerns , concerns on what is that that i really want, or perhaps really value deep inside me. I am getting clearer and i am happy with this echo because it is a second me that completes me.

I stared into the sky today as i ly down on the ground. I saw the sky. So tall. The most amazing thing is above me but i didnt lift my head up and see. I need to ring a bell to myself to look up as well as look down on the ground.

getting late. the world is getting hotter faster than usual. I am thinking of the ice caps now. Wish i can say hi to the caps before it melts away.